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Writer's pictureManuel Narvaez

Building Positive Relationships in Sports Volume 2: Parent's Role

Updated: Mar 3

This guide can provide tips and strategies for parents to encourage their child's growth and development, while also fostering a culture of respect and sportsmanship.


By Manuel Narvaez

 

Table of Contents


1. Introduction
2. Importance of Parental Support
3. Avoiding Negative Judgments
4. Respect for Coaching Authority
5. Maintaining Positive Conversations
6. Realistic Expectations
7. Navigating College and Professional Sports
8. Respecting Officials and Staff
9. Mindful Sideline Behavior
10. Remembering the Essence of Sports
11. Self-Evaluation Exercise for Parents
12. Conclusion

"Encourage your child's love for the game, and you'll nurture their passion for life."

1. Introduction


Do you have a child who loves sports? That's fantastic! As a parent, you can play a vital role in supporting your child's experience in sports. But do you know how to build a positive and healthy relationship with your child in this regard? Don't worry; let me guide you through it.


2. Importance of Parental Support


a. Providing Encouragement: Parents play a crucial role in providing encouragement and support to their children in sports. This support can significantly impact a child's motivation, confidence, and enjoyment of the sport.


b. Emotional Support: Being present at games and practices, offering words of encouragement, and celebrating successes, no matter how small, can boost a child's morale and foster a positive attitude towards sports.


Example (Basketball): Cheering for your child during a basketball game, regardless of the score, can motivate them to keep trying their best and enjoying the game.


How do you demonstrate support for your child during their sporting events?


3. Avoiding Negative Judgments


a. Impact of Negative: Comment Negative judgments or criticism from parents can have detrimental effects on a child's self-esteem and enjoyment of the sport. Instead of focusing on mistakes, parents should highlight areas of improvement and encourage their children to learn from experiences.


b. Promoting Positive Feedback: By emphasizing the positive aspects of a child's performance and providing constructive feedback, parents can help build their child's confidence and resilience in the face of challenges. According to a study by Jones et al. (2002), positive feedback and encouragement from parents contribute to a child's overall positive youth development in sports.


Example (Volleyball): After a volleyball match, praising your child's teamwork and effort, even if they didn't win, reinforces the value of collaboration and perseverance.


Reflective Question: How can you shift your mindset to focus more on positivity and encouragement during your child's sports activities?


4. Respect for Coaching Authority


a. Understanding Coach's Role: Parents should recognize the expertise and authority of the coach. The coach is responsible for guiding and instructing players, and interference from parents can undermine the coach's authority and create confusion for the child.


b. Supporting Coach-Player Relationship: By respecting the coach's decisions and fostering a positive relationship between the coach and the child, parents can contribute to a supportive and cohesive team environment.


Example (Basketball): Trusting the basketball coach's strategy and decisions, even if they differ from your opinions, demonstrates respect for their expertise and fosters unity within the team.








Reflective Question: How can you better trust the coach's expertise and authority during your child's sports events?

5. Maintaining Positive Conversations


a. Post-Game Discussions: After games, it's important for parents to engage in positive and supportive conversations with their child. Instead of focusing solely on performance outcomes, parents should offer encouragement and reassurance, regardless of the result.


b. Creating Safe Space: Providing a safe space for open communication allows children to express their feelings and concerns without fear of judgment, fostering a strong parent-child bond and promoting emotional well-being.


Example (Volleyball): Listening attentively to your child's reflections on a volleyball game and acknowledging their efforts and contributions can strengthen your bond and build resilience in handling both victories and defeats.


Reflective Question: How can you adjust your post-game conversations to be more supportive and uplifting for your child?

6. Realistic Expectations


a. Balancing Expectations: Parents should have realistic expectations for their child's performance and progress in sports. Unrealistic expectations can lead to undue pressure and stress, negatively impacting the child's enjoyment and motivation.



b. Celebrating Effort: Acknowledging and celebrating a child's effort, dedication, and improvement, rather than focusing solely on outcomes, can promote a healthy attitude towards competition and personal growth.


Example (Basketball): Recognizing your child's improvement in basketball skills, such as shooting or dribbling, regardless of game outcomes, reinforces the value of hard work and dedication.


Reflective Question: Are your expectations for your child's performance in line with their abilities and developmental stage?

Self-Evaluation Exercise for Parents:


  1. How do you react when your child makes a mistake during a game?

  2. Are your expectations aligned with your child's skill level and developmental stage?

  3. Do you focus more on the outcome of the game or your child's effort and enjoyment?

Fostering a positive relationship with your child in sports involves support, respect, and understanding. Reflect on your role as a parent in your child's sporting journey, and strive to create an environment where they can thrive, enjoy, and learn valuable life lessons through sports.

7. Navigating College and Professional Sports


a. Academic and Athletic Balance: While parents may support their child's aspirations for college or professional sports, it's important to prioritize academic success and personal development. Parents can help their child explore opportunities while maintaining a balanced perspective on sports and education.


b. Guidance and Support: Providing guidance and support in navigating the complexities of college recruitment and athletic scholarships can empower children to make informed decisions about their future in sports.


Example (Volleyball): Assisting your child in researching colleges with strong volleyball programs while emphasizing the importance of academic excellence sets the foundation for a successful transition to college athletics.




Reflective Question: How can you balance support for your child's sports aspirations with their overall academic and personal development?

8. Respecting Officials and Staff


Respecting Officials

a. Understanding Roles: Parents should respect the roles of officials and staff in sports events. Interference or disrespect towards officials can create a negative atmosphere and harm the child's experience in sports. Fredricks and Eccles (2006) found that extracurricular participation, including respect for authority figures in sports, is associated with beneficial outcomes in children's development.


b. Promoting Sportsmanship: By modeling respectful behavior towards officials and staff, parents can teach their child the importance of sportsmanship and fair play. 


Example (Basketball): Refraining from making negative comments or gestures towards the basketball referee, even if you disagree with their calls, promotes a respectful and fair environment for all players. 


Reflective Question: How can you model respect for authority figures in sports for your child?

9. Mindful Sideline Behavior


a. Positive Sideline Behavior: Parents should be mindful of their behavior and language while watching their child's games. Negative comments or behaviors can create unnecessary pressure and stress for the child and affect their performance.


b. Supporting Team Environment: By contributing positively to the team environment, parents can promote a sense of community and belonging for their child and their teammates.


Example (Volleyball): Cheering for the entire volleyball team, not just your child, shows support for the collective effort and helps build a positive team culture.


Reflective Question: How can you adjust your sideline behavior to create a more positive and supportive environment?



10. Remembering the Essence of Sports


"Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful." - Albert Schweitzer

a. Fun and Enjoyment: Parents should remember that sports are meant to be fun and enjoyable for the child. Pressure and expectations should not overshadow the pure joy of playing and participating in sports.


b. Valuable Life Lessons: Sports provide valuable opportunities for children to learn important life lessons such as teamwork, resilience, and sportsmanship. Parents should encourage their child to embrace these lessons and apply them in other areas of their life.


"The way a team plays as a whole determines its success. You may have the greatest bunch of individual stars in the world, but if they don't play together, the club won't be worth a dime." - Babe Ruth


Example (Basketball): Reminding your child that playing basketball is about having fun and working together as a team, not just winning, reinforces the value of sportsmanship and teamwork.


Reflective Question: How can you ensure that your child's sports experience remains enjoyable and fulfilling, regardless of outcomes?

11. Self-Evaluation Exercise for Parents


a. Reflecting on Behavior: Parents can engage in self-reflection and evaluation of their behavior and attitudes towards their child's sports participation. This exercise can help identify areas for improvement and promote a more positive and supportive relationship with their child.


b. Open Communication: Engaging in open and honest communication with their child about their sports participation can help parents gain a better understanding of the child's needs and preferences and foster a stronger parent-child bond.


Example (Volleyball): Reflecting on your behavior during a volleyball game and discussing it with your child can help identify areas for improvement and strengthen your relationship.


Reflect on the following questions to assess your support and behavior in your child's sports activities:


1. How do you react when your child faces challenges or setbacks in sports?

2. Are you actively involved in your child's sports activities, or do you tend to take a more passive role?

3. Do you prioritize your child's enjoyment and personal growth over winning and competition?

4. How do you communicate with your child about their experiences in sports, both positive and negative?

5. Are you open to feedback and suggestions from coaches and other parents regarding your behavior and involvement in your child's sports activities?



"By integrating sound sportsmanship principles into their parenting approach, parents can nurture positive relationships with their children in sports and create an environment where children can thrive.”

12. Conclusion


By following these guidelines, parents can build a positive and healthy relationship with their child in sports. Remember to provide encouragement and emotional support, avoid negative judgments, respect coaching authority, maintain positive conversations, have realistic expectations, navigate college and professional sports, respect officials and staff, practice mindful sideline behavior, remember the essence of sports, engage in self-evaluation, and promote open communication. With these tools, you can help your child achieve their full potential in sports while fostering a strong and supportive parent-child relationship.



 

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